security

shu qi said the feeling of secured is provided by the person himself, not from the person he wish to feel secured.. but now, me myself is unable to produce this type of feeling anymore, insecure is slowly taking over.. security is based on a person act, if a mistake had been repeated alot of time, the feeling of secure or to say trust is gone..

i slowly lost my trust on you, the reason i believe you for this round is i based on what i know you are and i wish i do know you well enough.. i wish a conversation between you and me will be able to boost up my ability to trust you again and hope you wont disappoint me.. a doubt had been temporary strike off yet i feel more doubt is turning out, it just seem to be a never ending story and it will not be 'happily ever after'..

god, i know i had been a crazy, disloyal, naughty, unfilial, stupid daughter, sister, friend and student, i still wish the worst will not happen.. yet the truth is, the more you want something not to happen, it will happen..